Tuesday, January 7, 2014

That Awkward Lesson...

I can't believe I actually did it! Yes, I sat down with my family and had the "where babies come from" lesson for Family Home Evening. Never once did I think that a seven-year-old boy or five-year-old and three-old girls would be ready to understand how a baby is made.I assumed that was a topic best understood when they were ready for the maturation program in 5th grade. Then one day while chatting with some friends it was brought to my attention that kids these days are learning about this stuff well before 5th grade and usually from their peers. If that was the case, then I would much rather them hear it from their mother first.

Probably because I'm expecting a baby in April, this has been a topic of great interest over the past few months. They've had so many questions and I always felt bad telling them, "I'll explain when you're older". But then when my son asked me one day why teenage boys start to grow mustaches, I began to explain to him what puberty was and he freaked out! I only mentioned hormones and armpit hair and that was enough for him to plug his ears and run away. So naturally, I did not think my kids would be ready to hear the whole shebang.

One day a friend of mine told me about this book, The Wonderful Way Babies Are Made by Larry Christenson . She said that it was the best book she had ever seen written for children, that explained everything with a Christian touch. When kids understand how sacred and special procreation is and Heavenly Father is involved, they aren't likely to freak out. Little children especially have an understanding of God  that sometimes most adults never can comprehend. So, talking about this in a spiritual tone is something they understand.

So, I went to the library and checked out a copy. As awkward as it was for my husband (funny as he grew up in Germany where the topic is liberally discussed at a very young age) I think he was glad that I taught our kids about procreation. This was something he learned from his friends and my parents as well never taught me a thing about it. In fact I remember when I was nine-years-old, looking in the mirror one day feeling really bloated in my belly and wondering if a baby was growing in there. It frightened me and I was afraid to ask an adult about it. I just didn't know how babies were made and I was embarrassed to ask. I eventually learned about it for the first time in 5th grade. I remember feeling so bothered that no one had prepared me for this information when I was younger. I was with my best friend and her mom (as my own mom couldn't get work off) and I felt so strange by the time it was over that I wanted to go home and take a shower.

It's my hope that by educating my kids when they are small that they won't feel so awkward about it when they are older. Also, with it not being a taboo topic in our home they will feel comfortable coming to me with any questions they have - unlike my childhood experience. In addition to that - because this knowledge came from their mother and was taught in our home through the guidance of the Spirit, they will treat it with more respect. I really believe that if my parents had taught me all about the birds and the bees and the sacredness of it, I would have had a much different perspective and respect about it growing up. Also, my peers further educated me on it after 5th grade and put their own philosophical spins on it that I believed because no one else had told me otherwise.

Now I can I let out a sigh of relief that we have already had the talk in our home.  All future discussion I'm hoping will be a breeze since we got through this one. I highly recommend this book! If you can keep it together in a spiritual tone as you read to your children they will be just fine. They react to your reaction - so if my husband and I were to laugh or turn red that could have been detrimental. I kept it together and answered all their questions along the way. Yes, I can happily say that now my kids understand where babies come from and how they are made!

DAILY QUESTION: At what age did you teach your kids and how did you go about having this discussion?


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